Absalom, O Absalom - Children Who Go Astray

by Candace Salima | More from this Blogger

03 Apr 2006 03:20 PM

The saddest situation a parent faces is a child who has gone astray. Literally leaving the gospel, it's rewards, comforts and peace behind for the much more difficult life in a world likely to turn on that child in a heartbeat. The grief in a parent's heart is tremendous, permeating their very soul and they have to stand back hoping the teachings given to that child will one day lead them home. President James E. Faust addressed this issue in the May 2003 Ensign, the conference issue: "But what if the children who have been taught by faithful, loving parents have rebelled or been led astray? Is there hope? The grief of a parent over a rebellious child is almost inconsolable. King David's third son, Absalom, killed one of his brothers and also led a rebellion against his father. Absalom was killed by Joab. Upon hearing of Absalom's death, King David wept and expressed his sadness: "O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! would God I had died for thee, O Absalom, my son, my son!" (2 Samuel 18:33) President James E. Faust - Dear Are the Sheep That Have Wandered

There is hope for those facing this heart wrenching dilemma. Prophetic promises given by President Joseph F. Smith upon the implementation of Family Home Evening hold the greatest promise for these grieving parents. If Family Home Evening was taught faithfully in the home; if parents taught their children the gospel; if parents were good and loving (not perfect) then that child will return to the fold- "not one child in a thousand will be lost". I saw this with my own brother as he fled as far away from home and gospel as he could. He lived a very dangerous life, served prison time and struggled with addictions which nearly cost him his life. One day, he looked around at his wife, children and circumstance and realized he'd had the truth all along. He began on that road, and today, is a righteous priesthood holder, sealed in the temple to his wife and a productive member of the Lord's kingdom. The prophetic promise held true for my mother.

"The Prophet Joseph Smith declared-and he never taught more comforting doctrine-that the eternal sealings of faithful parents and the divine promises made to them for valiant service in the Cause of Truth, would save not only themselves, but likewise their posterity. Though some of the sheep may wander, the eye of the Shepherd is upon them, and sooner or later they will feel the tentacles of Divine Providence reaching out after them and drawing them back to the fold. Either in this life or the life to come, they will return. They will have to pay their debt to justice; they will suffer for their sins; and may tread a thorny path; but if it leads them at last, like the penitent Prodigal, to a loving and forgiving father's heart and home, the painful experience will not have been in vain. Pray for your careless and disobedient children; hold on to them with your faith. Hope on, trust on, till you see the salvation of God." (Conference Report, Apr. 1929, 110) President James E. Faust - Dear Are the Sheep That Have Wandered

My dear friend who brought this topic to my attention. I hope this provides some comfort. The Lord awaits all who come to Him, even those who trod a more well-beaten path. Realize that the repentance each must go through, whether here or in the life to come is, as President Howard W. Hunter has said, "but the homesickness of the soul, and the uninterrupted and watchful care of the parent is the fairest earthly type of the unfailing forgiveness of God." The Teachings of Howard W. Hunter, ed. Clyde J. Williams (1997), 32.

The path is not an easy one, but there is unfailing hope. The covenants, and promises we make to our Savior are returned to us a thousand fold, even a million fold - really beyond our comprehension to understand. Live your lives as you know you should, dedicated to restoring of the Lord's kingdom. Love your son with everything in you, gently guiding him back to the Shepherd's fold, for the Lord never lies.

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Candace E. Salima was born right smack dab in the middle of twelve children.

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Dan Yates (10) 06 Apr 2006 09:31 AM

Interesting comments, but I was looking for something further. I've heard it said by some GA's that parents who have had a child sealed in this world will have great advantages in the next world when it comes to bringing a lost child back into the light. I know it has been said that a child brought up in a strong gospel home with regular family home evenings may stray, but will come back later in life. Not so with my son. He's made it clear that he wants nothing to do with the Church. What I'm looking for has to do with the power of the sealing when it comes to the next world. Thanks, Dan Yates.

Candace Salima (1604) 06 Apr 2006 12:45 PM

Hi Dan,

I realize that you were looking for something deeper - which is why I touched on the sealing power with Joseph Smith, Jr.'s quote:

". . . that the eternal sealings of faithful parents and the divine promises made to them for valiant service in the Cause of Truth, would save not only themselves, but likewise their posterity. Though some of the sheep may wander, the eye of the Shepherd is upon them, and sooner or later they will feel the tentacles of Divine Providence reaching out after them and drawing them back to the fold. Either in this life or the life to come, they will return. They will have to pay their debt to justice; they will suffer for their sins; and may tread a thorny path; but if it leads them at last, like the penitent Prodigal, to a loving and forgiving father's heart and home, the painful experience will not have been in vain. Pray for your careless and disobedient children; hold on to them with your faith. Hope on, trust on, till you see the salvation of God."

My brother also left the church, literally fled as far away as he could. He declared it false, worthless and treated that great treasure of the gospel with the greatest of disdain. There was a time when my parents ever despaired of seeing him back within the fold of the church. The one day, through startling circumstances, my brother started see that things were different. He'd committed armed robbery, he served time in a vile California prison, he was addicted to cigarettes and various drugs, and many more horrifying things. He turned his life around - through gentle caring and urging of my parents. Through the sealing power of the priesthood and the Holly Ghost's gentle whispers, he turned his life around.

Dan, I've seen happen this too many times to distrust that it can't happen in anyone's mortal life. There are great, great promises to the faithful parents who sought after the kingdom of God through ordinances and covenants. There are many things that will happen in the world to come - some we understand, some we don't. This is not the forum to address those sacred things. If you'd like to email me away from this forum I can share with you the things I have learned. But Br. Joseph does touch on what you are talking about in the above quote.